What if game.

PersonThing

There'd be a lot of auctions on ebay of hooks found on cars.

What if you had the choice between having sex with the person of your dreams or dying to save humanity from extinction?

Aquila Hawk

Eh, humanity has to die off at some point

What if coke was bought out by pepsi?

Cactuar Joe

The world would go on pretty much unchanged. Except it would taste a bit worse.

What if baseball metaphors killed those who used them?

PersonThing

There'd be a lot less businesspeople stepping up to the plate and hitting one out of the park.

What if you stuck two pieces of candy corn in your mouth like fangs and actually became a vampire?

Nwash

Well, I'm already nocturnal, so that wouldn't change. Still, I don't even like drinking tomato juice, much less blood, so I'd probably die of starvation.

What if you held the universe in the palm of your hand?

carbonbasedlifeform2000

the antimatter would react with the matter of my hand and a catastrophic explosion would happen destryoing all of known existence and creating a new metaverse due to interdimensional fallout. The resulting omniverse would be held in the palm of the hand of someone much larger than i was

what if my inane theoretical physics ramblings actually reflected the reality of the workings of existence?

Cactuar Joe

The universe would be obliterated as soon as Universe-Holding Guy had to blow his nose.

What if you were given a baby Zombie to take care of?

Adremmelech

You would wake up in an insane asylum repeating the phrase, "My hand is my girlfriend. My hand is my girlfriend."

What if you lived in the Bizzaro universe?

(damn you cactus head!)

carbonbasedlifeform2000

i would feed it baby brains and call it "Aberzombie The Bitch"

answer # 2: Superman would beat the hell out of me for being his weird gray doppleganger

what if 3 people all answered the same question and asked questions of their own which went unanswered?

Aquila Hawk

Nothing considering Nwash said "I got it!" and the universe fell out of his hand to catch a nerf ball. Way to destroy the universe Nwash. lol

What if people actually laughed at that joke?

Nwash

Um, yeah, sorry about that. I've always been a butterfingers. I'm saving up to buy a new universe, though.

Um, anyway, if people actually laughed at that joke...well, as goofy as I am, I did laugh a little...thus, things would be much the same.

So, um, what if the universe was destroyed and I had to buy a new one? Could I get it on ebay?

Aquila Hawk

That's two questions, no answer for you!

What if Darth Vader said YEEEEEEEEEES!

Cactuar Joe

In that case, I doubt that scene would have taken place on an operation table, if you get my drift.

What if I transmuted my boss into an acacia tree and sicced the giraffes on him?

Aquila Hawk

You would become known as the tree alchemist before you were captured and executed for using the philosopher's stone for human transmutation.

What if someone caught the obvious reference of my answer?

Daemon Sadi

Then you would probably be slapped.

What if I bought a plane ticket, flew to your house, knocked on your door, slapped you and then proceeded home?

carbonbasedlifeform2000

i would curl up in the fetal position and keep crying "why doesn't anyone like me"

what if marvel hadn't started making what if comics again?

Aquila Hawk

I would chase you down, and slap you with a box containing all the Full Metal Alchemist DVDs and the two games for being slightly quicker then I.

What if 70 lbs swords were manditory school supplies?

Gouden Draak

#1 - then the comic world wouldn`t have come down in crashing flames. (Superman dies, we`re looking at you)

#2 - Then there would have been a heck of a lot fewer school bullies.



What if Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie was just some big movie stunt?

Cactuar Joe

...You mean it isn't?

What if Angelina Jolie's lips detached from her face and went on a mad rampage, Godzilla-style?

Aquila Hawk

They haven't? Oh wait, those were Keith Richards lips.

What if Keith Richards and Angelina Jolie had some sort of unholy lip baby?

carbonbasedlifeform2000

then steven tyler would cry

what if steven tyler were "cryin"?

Cactuar Joe

I'd punch him in the arm and tell him not to be a baby.

What if everyone were required by law to wear a squid as headgear?

Aquila Hawk

Calamari jokes and foul smells would permiate the air

What if people everywhere watched Demolition Squid?

carbonbasedlifeform2000

then i would know what you're talking about.

what if eating rocks were a necessity?

Aquila Hawk

Ever hear of salt? (mineral Halite NaCl)

What if there wasn't a culinary geologist on the forums?

Nwash

Then I don't think there would be any in existence.

What if this is all a dream and we're all sleeping?

Cactuar Joe

Then I hereby demand that whoever's dreaming it lay off the anchovy pizzas before bed.

What if we all thought outside the box, made a team effort and prioritized the new paradigm?

Nwash

Then I wouldn't have to stab you for using all those buzzwords, because I'd have to stab you for using different ones.

What if managers weren't so fascinated with these stupid little phrases and cliches?

Gouden Draak

Then we'd actually know what's going on in the damned 3-hour meetings.


What if you really could get money by walking outside and beating up some bees and flowers?

Cactuar Joe

Then I'd be walking around with a six-foot katana looking for some daffodils, and you can call me MISTER Joe, if you don't mind.

What if people still used the phrase "Esquire" to describe un-attatched males?